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Friday, 20 March 2020
Last night I had a panic attack and you'll never guess what helped me get through it
You know what causes coughing and shortness of breath? COVID-19. Also the asthma I've had since I was a child, seasonal spring allergies, and probably the psychosomatic awareness that now is not a great time to cough.
Last night after dinner I found myself kind of hyperventilating, feeling like enough oxygen wasn't getting into my lungs. My heart was beating too fast. I've been lightly coughing for weeks for the prior reasons above; if anything it's been better lately. Possibly Jess and I were discussing the longterm effects of the pandemic a little too much. Whatever the cause, it was a downward spiral — I worried that I had contracted it somewhere. I worried about how the world has it, how there's literally nowhere you can go to escape the virus (Iceland is doing mass-testing). I worried about being stuck in our apartment for the next month, which is more psychologically taxing than actually dangerous.
I paced around the apartment, mind blank except for looping fears, and took some cold medicine. Nothing really slowed it down until Jess led me through some yoga, which I suck at, but it helped me feel like I was in control of my body a little more. Some website suggested smelling lavender, which we happen to have a bush of on the porch that survived the winter. That helped, too — the suggestion of a sunny day in a field. I also drew a sketch of these flowers from the farmers market, which I really hope is still happening on Saturday.
Try it yourself!
UPDATE: Here is the sketch, for Jennifer
Same but mild heart attack symptoms.
ReplyDelete<333 i was super irritable yesterday. Feel like it was a breaking point of sorts for lots of people.
ReplyDeletecan we see your sketch please // I feel you and I hope you're doing better KC
ReplyDeleteHave you tried 4-7-8 breathing? I've found it helpful during panic attacks and also with insomnia. Sorry you're going through this!
ReplyDeleteNo! I will have to look that up.
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