I skipped the Twilight Zone ride for THIS??

Originally my friend and I booked these as vacation days. Hit up Disney World and ride The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror before Disney does something reprehensible like replace it with something most people like. We have the rest of our lives to go on Spider-Man, Nutcracker and The Four Realms and Star Wars rides. I don't think there will be another cultural zeitgeist like the boomer's nostalgic early 90s that produces a giant multi-million Twilight Zone ride, where a cart drags you past the iconic giant eyeball and math equation before dropping you a dozen stories. (Did you know it was originally conceived as a Mel Brooks-themed attraction? Amusement parks will never be like this again!)

We pulled out on Wednesday night. Though there's zero doubt that was the right move I keep thinking how going on The Twilight Zone on Friday the 13th wouldn't have even cracked the top five most ominous things about the day. I see myself posing with Goofy and Mickey while hazmat teams spray down the Matterhorn and merch stands spark riots like some pop punk album cover sprung to life.



After cancelling our flight and hotel we each took half a tab, ate two whole pizzas and stayed up until 5AM watching Yuen Woo-ping's Dreadnaught.

It wasn't the intention going in but I ended up wondering if that was my "smoke-em-if-you-got-em" moment. It stopped me from getting any sleep. I'm going to try and go on thinking it wasn't. That I have many days, weeks and years left to waste. That some night, further down in life, an older sager version of myself is surrounded by loved ones and comfort while eating three whole pizzas.